About Us | ©2011 Salt & Pepper Consulting  Foxenwood 3 Basin: A love story! by James Pepper  Jed Clampett, patriarch of the famous Beverly Hillbillies clan, never had much use for the huge “cee-ment pond” out back of his lavish mansion. No doubt he was scornful of the extravagant expense of the thing, not counting the statuary. However, just north of Clubhouse Drive, not too far from where it crosses Foxenwood Drive, there is a cement pond that is truly priceless. It’s doubtful that even dear ol’ Jed could afford it. No, it’s not the Tennis and Swim Club swimming pool. That cement pond is just for people. You can’t get a truly expensive cement pond unless you fill it full of mud, let some wild plants and critters take root, and turn it over to the county. It’s official title is Foxenwood 3 Basin and frankly it’s not much to look at. Surrounded by dirt and weeds (the county calls it “a short fringe of vegetation, mostly Eleocharis sp.”), with overgrown bushes (“willow thicket”) sprouting from its muddy bottom, it’s the kind of stagnant watering hole only a mosquito could love—except that the county kills them off with Vectobac G every summer. But beauty is in the eye of the beholder and the county simply adores Foxenwood 3 Basin. It studies every little wrinkle and wart; in the wet season, in the dry season and even in something the county calls the “maintenance season.” Then, when the county’s heart is simply overflowing with love and admiration for Foxenwood 3, it writes ponderous odes to the homely little hole. Even the title must have cost a tidy sum: “Foxenwood 3 Basin routine maintenance addendum to the program EIR for Santa Barbara County flood control routine maintenance.” It almost makes one blush, doesn’t it, as if we are eavesdropping on a very private matter. The introductory paragraph starts out calmly enough: “Foxenwood 3 Basin collects runoff from the surrounding residential development where it currently slowly evaporates over the summer months, rarely going completely dry due to a hard pan underlying the basin. It receives runoff even during the summer months from residential landscape irrigation, etc. When the valves are in working order . . .” Yikes! There it is! Just when you are drifting off, thinking this sounds exactly like a hundred other love stories you’ve read, they hit you with the dramatic zinger: “When the valves are in working order!” So here is real trouble in lovers’ paradise because it turns out that one of the valves is not in working order. What’s worse, the outlet pipe within the basin is collapsing! In a similar situation, you or I might say, “Well, just drain the pond, replace the valve, fix the collapsing pipe and go have lunch.” But not Santa Barbara County. Remember, powerful passions are at play. (Next page . . . )